A Poem: Safe Inside

Hopefully I will be able to put more of my own short stories and poems on here. I wrote this poem for a class this year, but, as far as my poetry goes, this is one of my favorite pieces. Plus I always like poems better right after I write them, I’ll go back to this later in the year and cringe, thinking of all the other poetry I could have used instead of this one.

Safe Inside

I am thousands of thoughts
Gray markings on paper
With so much bite and scratch and claw
That inside is much safer

Emotions closed in words
Pages upon pages of feeling
Sealed with a golden lock
Constantly in careful hiding

Stowed under pillows and shelves
Stifled words of the weak
But wishing with a somber heart
That I had courage to speak

Years have past and with them
Desires held by invisible cages
But a chip of heart is still lost
forever in those pages

A Picture of Me

 tire_three_RWSD.jpg

So this is the tire swing in my backyard. My dad put it up a couple years ago by throwing the rope up over a reliable branch in the tallest oak tree in our yard(don’t ask me how, all I know is that he didn’t use a ladder) and tying a knot at the bottom, reinforcing it with, of course,  duct tape.

Whenever I need time to just relax and forget about schoolwork or soccer or anything else that’s bugging me, all I need to do is grab my Ipod and spend a mere half an hour on the tire swing and I feel instantly better.It’s not the Ipod, and it’s not the tire swing. It’s the combination of music that I love and a place that is always waiting for me, always welcoming, that really relaxes me. It reminds me that, no situation is as bad as it seems, and no matter what happens, everything will be all right.

I feel like this tire really does represent me. I’m an outdoorsy person and love being outside, especially in spring when the temperature is PERFECT. Over the years, whenever my friends have (what now looks in retrospect as) petty drama, the first place they want to go is over my house so they can swing. That tire has heard so many secrets, if it could speak, I’d have to kill it for fear of it knowing too much. Though the tire, like me, isn’t the most experienced at giving advice, it’s always there when you need it.

It also makes me think about my family, which is a huge part of my identity. I’m not one of those teenagers who hates their parents and locks themself in their room after school and doesn’t crawl out into the open until morning. Not saying that I never fight with or get really angry at my parents, but being with my family is important and is something I look forward to. My family likes being outside too, so we’re always on our back porch and, of course, my sister and I love pushing each other on the tire swing. To me, at least, this swing represents the simplicity of childhood and my home.

The thing about the tire that most represents me is the memories associate with it. Memories are one of the most important things in the world to me; I put a very high price on the things I can remember. Maybe I’m secretly sentimental. Maybe it’s just because I’m a writer, and as a writer, I like using real life experiences to influence my writing. 

But the thing about the tire swing is, it brings so many memories to the forefront of my mind and it makes me feel happy. There are so many memories trapped inside of that little tire that I can’t go near it without thinking about the last camp-out in my backyard my cousins had or the last time my best friend came over upset and we spent a few hours outside.

It represents everything I’ve ever done or said, and everything I can remember. It represents me.

33 things about me

1) (starting with the basics) I have one little sister (who is my best friend) and live with my mom and dad

2) my dog is a German shepherd named Demon (and the name suits him =p)

3) my favorite colors are purple, blue, and silver

4) i play soccer-both midfield and outside fullback

5) even though i play soccer, all of my closest friends are band weenies and stage crew geeks (and i am allowed to say this because they are my friends)

6) even though i love soccer, i enjoy the rifles the colorgaurd uses

7) my favorite food is cheese

8) if i could only have one type of music in the world, it would be country music because that’s what i grew up listening to and it’s still my favorite genre

9) even though she’s more country-pop, Taylor Swift is really cool and (me being a teenage girl) has lots of songs i can relate to, so she’s one of my favorite artists

10) though the show is stupid (thanks to Scott Fellows) and the dance moves are horrible, big time rush CAN sing and some of their songs are pretty cool

11) i prefer making webpages in script versus using word or an online website generator

12) i have a tire swing in my backyard

13) i signed up for key club and literary club this year but only went to two meetings each

14) there are only a handful of people i truly consider friends; half of them are guys

15) there are two reasons to watch a show: because it has a great plot line and because there is a cute guy on it =p big bonus if it has both

16) I’m painfully shy and hate public speaking

17) that being said, i like talking to people in general and love listening/eavesdropping on conversations

18) i still have a ton of barbie stuff in my room because i played with them all the time when i was a kid

19) i like playing halo but not hardcore-its more fun to just mess around on multiplayer with friends than do campaigns

20) I’m going to Austria over the summer und ich spreche ein bisschen Deutsch

21) i keep a journal that i write in almost every day

22) i write a lot of poetry and stories but often don’t finish my work because i can’t focus on one idea for too long before i get another or i get bored or i lose the “mood” of a piece and just can’t finish

23) i hate sharing any poetry or stories i write

24) i have never been to Disney-world

25) i eat the edges of my peanut butter and jelly sandwiches first because the middle is the best part

26) my favorite number is 3-Dale Earnhardt Sr’s number, faith, hope and love, Father, Son, Holy Spirit, etc.

27) i love NASCAR racing and always watch it with my dad

28) my dad is a redneck-and i love him for it

29) my house is small in comparison to a typical development house but i love it

30) my yard is about an acre big and i love that too because i like spending time outside

31) unfortunately, my friend has caused me to take a liking to Broadway music

32) i’m not particularly fond of anime and manga but i like lucky star because the four girls are like perfect replicas of me and my friends-it’s pretty funny how close the characters are to the real-life us

33) i’m not quite sure what i want to do with my life (career-wise) because there are so many different things i love and so many different things i want to do